I wanna be eaten by mushrooms when I die
I told my little sister that I want the greenest fucking funeral in the world. No embalmbing liquid, no creamation bullshit, I wanna be made into a tree and crap. My sister responed, "So you just want me to kick you in a hole or something?"
Whoa! Nobody said "kick" you psychopath! I may need to find a new executor.
At first I thought just bury me near a tree and eventually my body will feed it, but then I remembered that trees don't eat people, so I was like "Fuck, what do I do now?"
Voila! The Mushroom Death Suit!
Are you fucking kidding me? I can have mushrooms eat my body so I become part of nature and organically reincorporate my atoms into the earth?! I WISH I WAS DEAD NOW!
Long story short, let's all be eaten by mushrooms when we die. It's so hot right now.